My Library

correctly. I kept fumbling for the reverse switch, but was unable to find it. (The picture had gone by this time.) I then saw what looked like film unwinding on the floor, and I thought I had broken the mechanism by tampering with it. This made me nervous, and I headed back for my body to avoid trouble, returned, and re-entered easily. 5/3/60 Afternoon I lay there, fully conscious, vibrations speeded up to nothing but warmth sensation, eyes closed. I was about to lift out when two hands held a book in front of my closed eyes. The book was riffled, turned around on all sides so that I could see that it was a book. The book was then opened, and I started to read. The gist of what I read was that in order willfully to bring back a condition, it was necessary to recreate the feeling of a similar experience that had occurred in the past (i.e., was a part of your memory). I took this to mean that one should think of the "feeling," rather than the details of the incident. Several illustrations were given, then gradually the book went out of focus as the vibrations faded, and try as I might, I could not continue reading. Finally, I sat up physically and made notes. 3/9/59 Night As I lay there with the vibrations strong in the dark, the special black darkness I could "see" with my closed eyes, the darkness grew brighter in one spot, as if clouds were parting, rotting back, and unfurling, and finally a white ray of light came through from somewhere above my head. (I could still hear the noises of family activity in the house and was still completely aware of time-space. I was still home and completely conscious.) I became excited, but managed to keep in stasis. A small mountain peak seemed to grow in the center of the white ray, just where it hit the clouds. I gathered courage, and asked for the fundamental answer to my basic questions. I do not know why I did, but it seemed to be what I should do. A rich, deep voice—yet not a voice, and certainly not my conscious mind, as I was waiting expectantly—answered. "Are you sure you do want to know?" It came more from the light ray. I replied that I was sure. "Are you strong enough to take the true answers?" There was little inflection and no emotion in the delivery. I replied that I thought I was. I waited and it seemed a long long time before the voice spoke again.