Lehal Library

now. “When I seek to perceive ultimate reality for me, (what I think you are referring to when you use the word ‘home’), I experience blankness and bliss. Blankness, not because it is blank, but because I attempt to experience it with mental processes that are geared to the five physical senses and that are in the habit of perceiving illusion. I am trying to use my biological illusion computer to perceive beyond the apparent limits of illusion. Like trying to smell a flower with your ear. I experience bliss because emotional feeling is the only perceptual tool that I am able to use to sense beyond the illusion. If there are other perceptual tools that are available to me, they are either atrophied by lack of use, and must somehow be reactivated, or they must be initially activated. 2312-CF “… During one ‘Rebal’ breathing exercise I experienced what was the beginning of some rather puzzling happenings. For reasons unknown to me I was suddenly in a black box—a void of total blackness. It was like being juggled from one extreme to the other— from total sensation to lack of sensation. Frustration began to invade me, for I found it was somewhat difficult finding a way out of this vast blackness. In my next tape I began to experience the blackness again, and that’s when I started to worry. At our next meal I mentioned what was occurring to our trainer, hoping she might offer a solution. “During our discussion, my problem was overheard by a few males at the table who had apparently been listening in. Later one of the men took me aside to explain. He told me that a few of the men in our group had found themselves fantasizing about me during their own tape experiences—hence all the sexual thought vibrations I was picking up. He also told me that, having a hard time dealing with their sexual attraction, they were putting me in their ‘energy conversion box’ (a place to leave problems behind) before embarking into their other states of consciousness. They had all helped put me in